Holidays are full of families and traditions, but they can be a challenge for families living with dementia. With a little planning and a few adjustments, the holidays can still be an enjoyable time for your whole family.
11 Tips for Enjoying the Holidays When a Loved One Has Dementia
- Update others on your current situation. Send a short note or make a quick call to explain some of the changes visitors might notice. Ask for their understanding, acceptance and flexibility.
- Modify the traditional holiday routine. Keep your loved one’s regular daily routine in place as much as possible.
- Recognize your limits. Delegate and manage only what you can, with no guilt. Boundaries are good. Pare down big traditions and expectations.
- Build on past memories and traditions. Involve your loved one in manageable tasks by breaking them down into smaller, safe steps.
- Schedule events during their best time of day. Start new traditions as needed. For example, have a holiday brunch instead of dinner if sundowning is a problem or mornings are better.
- Adapt gift giving. What was once enjoyed may not be appropriate now. Ask others to consider intangible gifts such as gift cards, “helper” or “one-on-one time together” coupons, or caregiver respite.
- Limit shopping to what you can handle. Include the person with dementia in gift giving whenever possible.
- Help with names and recall. Use name tags, and say names and relationships together. Assist your loved one with tactful, subtle cues and reminders, and plan how to engage them at gatherings. Keep their dignity intact.
- Use all the senses. Enjoy the sights, sounds and scents of the season: visit neighborhood light displays, attend familiar church or community services, bake together, or enjoy holiday music and movies.
- Remember that perceptions change. Too much decorating can feel overwhelming, blinking lights may be frightening, and some decorations could be mistaken for treats.
- Be gracious and flexible. Have a “plan B”: a quiet spot to go to, a less stimulating activity, or someone who can spend time with your loved one away from the crowd if it becomes “too much.”
With advance planning, you and your loved one can avoid the frenzy of the holidays. By keeping everything in your loved one’s best interest, you make the season less stressful and more enjoyable for everyone.
Need a Break This Holiday Season?
Friends Place Adult Day Services offers dementia-focused adult day care in Richardson, DeSoto and Plano, giving caregivers time to shop, rest or prepare for the holidays while their loved one enjoys a safe, engaging day. Schedule a tour or read our caregiver’s guide to dementia care at home.
About the Author
Pam Kovacs Johnson is the founder of Friends Place Adult Day Services. With more than 30 years of experience in the field of aging, Pam has extensive knowledge and training in all areas of Alzheimer’s and dementia care. Learn more about Friends Place, or follow us on Facebook.
